AskDwightHow.org 365/24/7
THE 14:24 GUEST HOUSE
"I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant."
14m 24s
"Don't you think I'm great?!
I love creating these images for you."
~35 questions that will change your life
(read and answer five questions a day
with a ranking for each,with 0 = never and 10 = fully)
Am I...
1. remembering that happiness is life’s purpose for me and everyone else?
2. 100% responsible for the quality of each and every one of my relationships (thereby not giving away any of my power). This means no blame and no guilt?
3. remembering that my #1 job in my life is to take care of myself?
4. remembering that I am the final judge (always thinking for myself, even though I can make mistakes) as to what it means to take care of myself and what will make me happy, currently and for my future?
5. worrying, feeling pressured, overwhelmed, impatient, guilty, or regretful? Am I using “Holy Molys...” to dissolve any of these feelings?
6. under promising both to myself and to others, creating and maintaining both time and money buffers in my life?
7. looking for ways for my self-interests (taking care of myself) and the self-interests of others (them taking care of themselves) to fit together?
8. asking myself, “How am I fighting with reality right now?” whenever I am suffering, or life seems hard?
9. asking myself, “How could this be a gift? How could I make a gift out of this?” whenever I am upset about something or with someone.
10. listening deeply to others, seeking first to understand them, second to be understood?
11. choosing courage to live a life true to myself, not necessarily the life others expect (or may expect) of me?
12. choosing courage consistently to make requests and to say “no”?
13. choosing courage to keep good boundaries with others?
14. choosing courage to be more authentic and self-expressed with myself and others (while keeping my mouth shut when needed)?
15. choosing courage to graciously accept when others say "no" to me or reject me?
16. choosing courage to let go of expectations of both myself and of others?
17. choosing courage to prioritize enjoying the process over any specific result?
18. showing respect to myself, my friends, my colleagues, my reports, my boss, and my family members?
19. choosing courage to accept that others may sometimes be upset with me or think badly of me?
20. ensuring that my Next is showing respect and consideration for what my Now wants and needs?
21. being my own best friend? Am I giving myself admiration, compassion, and understanding?
22. letting go of defensiveness? Am I remembering there is nothing to defend?
23. remembering that others’ upset with me means nothing bad about me?
24. watching the machinery of my mind with compassion and curiosity, knowing that I am not my machinery?
25. remembering to bring myself present to this moment, letting go of the past and the future?
26. remembering that others are just trying to take care of themselves the best they know how?
27. using the Partnership Conversation whenever I have a conflict with another?
28. avoiding toxic words like good, bad, right, wrong, fair, unfair, difficult, obligation, not good enough, should, and shouldn’t?
29. bringing play, adventure, curiosity, and gratitude to each moment of my day?
30. accepting that everyone's choices (including mine) are not right or wrong, not good or bad, but have costs, benefits, risks, and possibilities, for themselves and for others, both short-term and long-term?
31. remembering to notice a soul-to-soul connection with each person in my life?
32. remembering that, after breathing, getting enough sleep and feeling well rested are the #1 life priority for myself?
33. remembering to maximize the source of my calories, moving toward 100%, that I get from eating whole, unprocessed, plant foods (greens, beans, grains, seeds, fruits, berries, root vegetables, nuts, mushrooms, fungus, seaweed, teas, coffees, spices, nutritional yeast, algae, and bee pollen), along with supplemental vitamin B12?
34. using my mobile alarm to remind me to ask myself five of these questions each day?
35. using and learning from AskDwightHow.org at least weekly?
Thrive By Five: Stepdancing Your Life
Oh, take out a pen and get ready to see,
Five questions a day is indeed a great key!
From zero to ten I will rank as I go,
And watch how I flow and I sow and I grow!
For happiness, friend, is the purpose of life,
For me and for you and for husband and wife!
Five questions a day! Just five, that is all!
A ranking, a nudge, a compassionate call,
Without blame, without guilt, without whip, without shove!
But watching my machinery with curious love!
One hundred percent of any power that I hold,
It’s mine to attend, it’s mine to unfold!
I’ll give up my power when I make them wrong,
And guilt is a leash that will drag me along!
My number one job, it’s my first, don't you see,
Is caring for me, and then second for thee!
And I get to say, I decide, I alone,
What caring for me means, it's mine and my own!
When worry and pressure and hurry appear,
When guilt and regret come to whisper too near,
A great “Holy Moly…” dissolves all of that,
While under-promising builds a soft, springy mat,
With buffers of time and of dough as life flows,
There's slack in the line and there's room left to go!
I'll ask, how am I fighting reality hard?
Is there something I'm thinking I have to guard?
And whenever I'm upset, I’ll ask and I’ll sing,
How could this be a gift, or a gift I could bring?
I listen down deep, seeking first to know you,
Then second, I ask will you know my view too?!
Your interests and mine, we can fit them together,
Like birds of a feather in fine flocking weather!
And when we collide and the conflict burns hot,
A Partnership Conversation, that's what we’ve got!
Now courage! Oh courage! I'll use quite a lot
To live my own life and not somebody's plot!
The courage to ask, and the courage for “NO,”
The courage to hold a good boundary just so!
The courage to speak what is truly in me,
And courage to hear someone's no, graciously!
The courage to drop my expectings galore,
And relish the process far more than the score!
The courage to let someone frown at my name,
For others' upset means no fault and no blame!
There's nothing to guard and there's nothing to fend,
So I’ll drop the defenses and be my best friend!
Admiring, goodwill, understanding and warm,
A friend to myself in the calm and the storm!
I'll bring myself here to this moment, right now,
I’ll let go of the then and the when and the how!
My Next should be kind to what Now wants and needs,
And others? They're planting the best of their seeds!
So toss out the toxic: the good and the bad,
The right and the wrong and unfair, oh how sad!
For choices aren't wicked and choices aren't right,
They have costs and have benefits and risks in the light,
Possibilities too, in the near and the far,
For me and for you and whoever we are!
I'll notice the soul that is shining in you,
And show you respect, and respect to me too!
With play and adventure and wonder and awe,
And gratitude sprinkled on all that I draw!
And after my breathing, the top of my list,
Is sleep, glorious sleep, let it never be missed!
Then whole plant-y foods, all unprocessed and green,
With B12 on the side, keeping every gear clean!
An alarm on my phone gives its five-question ring,
And weekly, AskDwightHow gives more questions to sing!
Five questions a day! Just five, that is all!
A ranking, a nudge, a compassionate call,
Without blame, without guilt, without whip, without shove!
But watching my machinery with curious love!
